The Morgan Family

Thursday, October 13, 2011

The reality hits

We are so overwhelmed with life right now. Justin is student teaching by day and waiting tables by night while finishing his masters degree (come on December!). I am working full time, traveling for work, and trying to keep up with our house...oh yeah, and Jack is now 5 1/2 months old.

And then the reality hits...we are, by choice, asking for another layer of stress, pressure, and craziness into our lives. We are adopting. And when I stop and think about what that means, it is a lot to consider. We are asking for another child and one that we have zero control or influence on his or her life until he or she enters our home. We have no idea what his background is, why he is an orphan, what happened to his family, or how he was treated from birth to us. And we have very limited control as to how those initial months will impact his entire life.

And yet...we want nothing more than him. Last night Jack was finishing his last bottle and I didn't have a book close enough to grab so I decided to tell him a story. I told him the story of how his little brother or sister will be joining our family and you know what he did? He smiled bigger than I've ever seen him smile before. And my heart swelled with love. I love Jack more than I could ever explain. It is unbelievable that there could be more room in my heart for another baby and yet I already do! I may not know what our baby looks like but I can already see his spirit and hold him in my heart even though he may not even be born yet!!

We know that this is a marathon. We know that we are taking a risk by adopting in general, let alone in a country that is not part of the Hague convention. We know that we could accept a referral and something could happen to our baby before we even get there or after we arrive to take him home. We even had to sign a document that says we know what the risk is and we accept that risk! But we also know that God has called us to adopt and we are beyond excited that He has chosen us. We know that we are saving a little boy (or girl) from a very unknown future but even more so, we know that a little boy (or girl) is saving our family from having a gap in it that he was created to fill. This is a two way street. And we're just happy to be along for the ride.

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